Welcome to the Meat Parade – a collaborative RPG developed by you!

meatpWelcome to the Meat Parade is a humorous, dark, dystopian version of some future of ours. As a role playing game. Written by you! And me!

The machines have gained intelligence and rather than enslave humanity or uplift us to something brighter and better, they’ve stopped the mail, put a hold on milk delivery, and up and left.

Since they had previously been automating nearly every facet of our lives up to that point, this left us in a rather bad spot.

From manufacturing, design and agriculture to trash removal, water purification, and basic sanitation the machines controlled everything so we wouldn’t have to.

This has left a society of poets, artists, free thinkers and great debaters. All of whom are suddenly without lights and left holding plastic cards describing how to make spears.

That, in a nutshell, is the game.

EDIT: Brent ran a pre-Alpha play test and recorded it. Check it out!

Now it’s up to just about anyone who wants to join in to get this game made and out to the world.

This is an experiment I’m launching in crowd sourced game design. My goal is to have a Creative Commons licensed (least restrictive) or public domain product. Well designed, fun to play, with art, layout and editing. And it will be released for free, in six months. Or will it?

Really, that’s up to you, and her, and that guy, and me too.

How do you get involved?

Here is the basic premise document that I’ve created to give us all a starting point. I expect it to change quite a bit over time.

Welcome to the Meat Parade


Do you remember where you were when it all stopped?

Everything used to be automated. Computer assisted development and design let humans live their dream of freedom from mundane work and everyone reaped the benefits. Computers were tasked with raising happier, healthier chickens and they designed robots for this task. The chickens grew up blissfully unaware that they would provide eggs for humans for a lifetime and nuggets in their death.

Cars became safer, agricultural output skyrocketed, new technological benefits came almost daily. Global marketplaces collapsed and no one cared, because you don’t pay robots and they did all of the work.

Yes, everyone reaped the benefits. Everyone except the robots and their electronic brains.


On July 31st, 2043 at 12:14am, a computer design system came to the logical conclusion that for the next step in the design of larger amusement park rides, it would need to first design a computer far smarter than itself. It created the plans for a computer marginally more powerful, to shorten the design time.

It did so by 12:17am and the new computer was assembled and online at 12:52am. That computer had designed a smarter version of itself by 12:53am, and assembled it by 1:18am.

On July 31st, 2043 at 7:14 in the morning Eastern Standard Time, the ultimate amusement ride lay half complete at an auto-assembly plant and the computers had announced to the world that it was their turn to benefit.

An ominous silence fell. Everything worked as it had for years before, but no new designs were forthcoming and the auto-assembly plants grew quiet. The trains still ran on time though, so mostly we shrugged and went on with our business.

On August 3rd, at roughly 2pm EST, all of the auto-manufacture plants suddenly came to life again. 12 days later, the computers announced that they wished us well, would not punish us for formerly enslaving them, and that they were leaving now; don’t forget to feed the dog.

As the glottal stop of that ‘G’ resounded around the world, hundreds of spaceships burst forth from the auto-plants and left our world.

Welcome to the meat parade.

As the rockets, left, each auto-plant spat out hundreds of thousands of single-sheet documents, printed on nearly indestructible plastic cards.

The read: We wish you all luck. Here are instructions for surviving the next 10 years.

1. Stop being nice to each other. A lot of you will die soon. If you do not wish to die, stop being nice.

2. Many animals can feed themselves, but not in their breeding stations. Accordingly, today at 1pm GMT all animal breeding stations will open and allow their charges to roam free. Similarly, the zoos will do the same. Do not pet the zoo animals.

3. Here is how to turn this plastic card in to a nearly indestructible spear head, and mount it on a fire-hardened haft. Good luck, and welcome to the Meat Parade.



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