Warning: This podcast has been deemed Not Safe For Work due to swears, sexual situations, Flock of Seagulls hair, Members Only jackets and more swears.
What’s going on here?
We’re playing the Palladium Fantasy RPG (1st edition, thank you very much) and enjoying the hell out of it. No maps, no minis, no censors, almost no editing! We’ve been recording our sessions for your enjoyment. You can find us on iTunes or DriveThruRPG, along with other podcasts in the Old School series, or visit the links below to download individual episodes.
Scott – GM, nominally in charge.
Jenn – Echo, a 3rd level Human Warlock.
Dan – Mukklukk, a 3rd level Kobold Mind Mage.
Ben – Hamash Snozzle, a 3rd level Elvish Wizard & Heretofor Unknamed, a 3rd level Elvish Assassin. The two are brothers.
The House Rules – How We Roll
- Healing: Regain your level in hit points every night. If the medical skill has successfully been applied, gain your level*2 hit points every night.
- Assassins get a new elective skill: Prowl (+18%)
- The Perception Skill: Base percentage is IQ +ME divided by 2. Add 10 to this. This skill increases at 4%/level and everyone has it.
- Any powers/abilities listed that take less than one round, now take one full round.
- Some skills will require opposed skill checks (perception vs. prowl for instance). Higher successful roll margin wins.
- Anyone that can cast spells has to either write down the effects, or at least the page number in the 1st edition book.
Session 0 – Unrecorded.
All we did here was generate our characters, muse on what life was like before we were old enough to vote and do one test encounter with a few hobgoblins.
A River Runs Through It – Session 1
In this, our second session but first adventure, join the party as they defeat any number of enemies and are in turn defeated by a stupid river and an inept assassin. Two hours and twenty four minutes of actual play goodness.
- The party is given a mission to deliver several magically defended boxes.
- They realize that they won’t be able to steal them, so continue on with their mission.
- On arriving to their delivery destination, they find the town laid to waste and acquire a 10 year old girl.
- But – they pick up a trail. The trail of a large army. The waste laying army that. . . laid the town?
- On coming to a large river, the party loses most of the day and most of the assassin trying to cross.
- In the last encounter of the session, the party is viciously attacked by spell casting fairy pigs… or were they?
We all run away – Session 2
In this episode – we begin to record just as a nasty thunder and lightning storm moves through! We rescue the salty mouthed innkeep, reunite her with her daughter and get slapped around by some orcs. Only then do we realize that we’ll once again have to cross that river, and try to get the attention of an entire fort of soldiers who think this is just another boring day on the dusty frontier. Lastly, we get mugged.
- The party tracked down a small band of Orcs, panicked a bit and rescued the innkeeper.
- They escorted her back towards the keep. Or was it the other way around?
- Once again they valiantly strove against a not so raging river, and mostly prevailed.
- On arriving back at the keep, they talked their way into the captains office and underwhelmed him with tales of orcs and ogres.
- They then ran like little girls from the approaching non-human army.
- In the last encounter of the session, they mostly slept, but not on purpose.
What will befall our little band of adventurers next? Who the hell knows!
We open doors – Episode 3
(Recorded April 15th, 2011) In this episode, we get jumped by a pig. With a stinger! Then we talk a bunch of highly trained, heavily armed troops in to letting us scout for them. In our scouting mission, we kill giant wolves with knives, open a bunch of doors and accidentally bypass the majority of the dungeon.
The check mix
- The party was assaulted by some sort of pig/scorpion hybrid. We won.
- We stood aside as 60 armed knights rode past. They talked to us and somehow we ended up richer, and walking 50 kilometers to reconnoiter a keep.
- Before they reached the keep, they got jumped by orcs riding wolves. The warlock casts her first spell of the game, and then impales several wolves with sharp, pointy things.
- The spellcasters level up. Fireball becomes an option.
- They open doors.
- They then bypass a good chunk of the dungeon thus giving our GM fits.
Death in the Dungeon – Episode 4
- The party kill a significant percentage of the Orc population.
- But leave the kitchen staff alone, in case They’re feeling peckish.
- The party find out that human/orc relations are deteriorating except between several, special friends.
- The Kobold finds yet another secret door.
- The party discovers a graveyard in a sub-dungeon, after fighting off a band of walking dead.
- The Kobold meets his maker.
- They all get rich.
- The party collects the largest bits of the Kobold in preparation for Episode 5.
We Cheat Priests – Episode 5
(Recorded September 3rd, 2011) In this episode we meet a swarm of nasty, cute, fuzzy things that try and kill us with the death of a thousand cuts. Then we cheat a priest out of 6,000 gold pieces while buying new armor. Our kobold pulls a resurrection act and rejoins the podcast. We get a boat, all to ourselves. Then we immolate 6 ex-villagers after placing a gigantic ice wall in their way and shooting them full of arrows. Good times.
Frolicking good times:
- We manage to enrage at least one priest, possible one elder god.
- Our Kobold bids a fond farewell to his maker and returns to the realms of dust and crits.
- The party attempts sailing on a river again, with marginal success.
- Zombies behind an ice wall!
- Did you know that ice walls are really, really hard to climb?
- It’s like shooting zombies stuck behind an ice wall!
Back in the bowl – Episode 6
(Recorded September 2011) In this episode, we encounter a troupe of dancing mystical midgets, acquire their bowl of extraordinary power and find out why mom always said not to play ball in the house. Someone has the audacity to try and ambush us using trees. Our mage comes <—-> that close to joining our once deceased kobold, and then we wander into a city and paint it red.
Lip smacking highlights:
- The party discover magical, chanting little people
- And promptly start a small religious war.
- The party discovers a magical bowl of intense power and meaning.
- The party discovers why it’s not a good idea to use a magical bowl of intense power and meaning as a shield.
- Someone drops a tree on the party.
- Then the party finds a way into a city, and buys all the supplies.
More to come soon!