Feb 202009
 

Quake fan?  Always dreamed of playing it in your browser?  On the 24th of this month (that’s 4 short days from this writing) you’ll be able to fulfil that dream.

Quake Live is well, going live in beta form.  They’ve got a nifty count down on their site along with the abililty to download some Quake Live Wallpaper.

Created by id Software as an all-new way to deliver the excitement and energy of first-person multiplayer action to a broader audience than ever before, QUAKE LIVE offers game players of all skill levels a totally free and easily accessible multiplayer gaming experience and community through a single website at quakelive.com. Every element of the experience, including friends lists and communication, sponsored events and tournaments, matchmaking, stats tracking, and even the game itself is accessed and delivered free of charge through the web browser. Integrated with IGA’s proprietary SDK, QUAKE LIVE will offer companies and agencies fresh opportunities to dynamically-target brands to audiences within a broadly accessible version of one of the world’s premiere game franchises, while also offering gamers a totally free premium game, fun events and a vibrant, active community of other players.

I wonder if they’ll include a boss hotkey for those of us who love Quake and also work on or near computers all day?

[tags]quake live, video games[/tags]

Feb 202009
 

Check out this great video detailing how to defeat heavy cavalry in Total War: Empire.  I’ve got this game preordered and sitting on my steam account just waiting for release day.

I’ve been fan of the Total War series since Samurai.  This looks to be a great game in a long line of great games!

Speaking of this game – the demo is now LIVE on steam!

[tags]video, video games, total war[/tags]

Feb 202009
 

Ah Friday.  For me it’s been a short week, although it’s felt about twice as long as a normal one.  What better way to round out a long short week (and a payday) with some good stuff cheap?

Let’s start with Dell selling Sony’s PSP for some reason.  While that’s strange, the good news is you can get a PSP Slim for $135.99 with free shipping.  Just enter coupon code PLDWH47D$6BT2J at checkout.

Good Old Games has an Oddworld special on this weekend.   Oddworld: Abe’s Oddysee and Oddworld: Abe’s Exoddus for $16.98.  As always with GOG stuff, it will work on XP and Vista and is 100% DRM Free. Yay!

You can get this cool LEGO Midsize Classic White Dial Blue Watch for $21.99, or 8 bucks off.  Yup, a Lego watch.

Amazon has 4 downloadable games on sale. Richochete Extreme, Build in Time and World Tree are all $3.98.  Big Kahuna Reef 2 is $6.98.

There are 11 pages of 50% off movies, all previous award winners.  All kinds of good stuff to be found there.

You can pre-order Twiight DVDs (and Blu-ray) and save bucks, provided you want the 2 disc or Ultimate Collectors set.  The movie will be released on DVD March 21.

On the fence about Netflix?  New subscribers get 2 weeks of free movies.

There are the cool deals I found today.

[tags]deals[/tags]

 Posted by on February 20, 2009  Tagged with:
Feb 202009
 

According to the Internet Movie Database, a new Dune film is scheduled to go into production next year. The very fact that this has been green lighted so soon after the Sci-Fi Channel’s above average adaptation blows my mind to the very core. Why do we even need this? Who in Hollywood thought that this would be a good idea to begin with? Yes there were problems with the Lynch version being akin to a bad acid trip, but I can forgive it for what it is; Frank Herbert was on set for most of the filming and the man himself gave it his seal of approval despite problems that long time fans of the book have with it. (Weirding Modules and the end of the film, I’m looking at both of you) While I’m the first to admit that the Sci-Fi channel is far from perfect itself, it’s a closer adaptation to the source material, especially if you can look past the cheap sets and the William Hurt robot they built to play Duke Leto Atreides. Neither are perfect in any way shape or form, but I do give a lot of credit to Sci-Fi for trying to stay as close to the source material as possible and taking their time by stretching it out to six hours to get as much as possible in, and I have to hand it to Lynch for casting Patrick Stewart as Gurney Halleck, since he IS Gurney to me now. In a perfect world I would take elements of both and create the perfect Dune for the screen.

This brings us to the latest Hollywood try at bringing Dune to the Screen. Dune is a complex mélange of theme that are difficult, maybe impossible to convey on the screen; the two previous attempts at bringing it to a wider audience is a testament to this fact. Then why should they even try it again? The real answer is the only answer when it comes to anything that Hollywood does and that is money. The executives in their offices are convinced that you will put your hard earned money down to see this film whether is turns out bad or good. They want your money and they feel that Dune can bring it to them, DVD sales of the Lynch version and the revisionist “Dune” novels of Brian Herbert (more on him later) appearing on the New York Times Bestseller lists show them that there is a market for this film.

This movie will not be good, it can’t be good, it will come out like Koko the signing gorilla describing the collected works of Hunter S Thompson; the gist might be there, but almost all of it will be lost in translation. Most people have forgotten that during the first week of Lynch version of Dune audiences were given a pamphlet of terms to help them understand the movie! Where did this glossary come from? The back of the novel! The original work is so complex that it has to explain itself to the reader! I don’t want this movie to go into production.

I’m blasting this out of love for the property. I love the Dune Chronicles. I read Dune once a year and I get a different meaning out of it every time I do. I have all of the books in their hardbound first edition formats. I have a rare first edition hardbound from 1965. I bought Frank Herbert’s collection of short stories, titled Eye because of the author approved illustrations of Dune characters and the accompanying short story. I have two editions of the apocryphal Dune Encyclopedia in both softbound and the extremely rare hardbound editions. I own both versions of both Dune screen adaptations and Children of Dune on DVD. I have a lot invested in the Dune Chronicles and I know, as sure as the sun will rise in the east and set in the west that a two hour film adaptation will do nothing for it but bring in more readers to the series and that is the only good thing that I can think of that will come of this.

Brian Herbert has been making a cottage industry out his father’s work for a decade now and it really grinds my gears just as much as the news of the new movie does. I suffered through his novels to get to the mythical Dune 7. For those of you that don’t know about this here is the original order of books in the Dune Chronicles in order:

• Dune
• Dune Messiah
• Children of Dune
• God Emperor of Dune
• Heretics of Dune
• Chapterhouse: Dune

If you haven’t read these, you’re missing out. Dune has been described as the Lord of the Rings of sci-fi, a comparison that I cannot apply to it since I can’t get past the first ninety pages of LoTR before putting it down. The series is expansive and spans thousands of years of human history. As a matter of fact, the first novel takes place in the year 10,191 AG. The AG stands for “After Guild”, the guild meaning the Spacing Guild which makes interstellar travel possible, and there is no reference to the relevance of the years before that other than labeling the years before that as BG, “Before Guild” much as we use the BCE label. The last book of the original series takes place in the year 15,240 AG so you can see we’re dealing with a huge amount of history with just these six books.

History is the problem with Brian Herbert and Kevin J Anderson’s Dune novels. They have written nine Dune novels in the last ten years and they have all been terrible. I read the first of his prequel trilogy, the ‘House’ series with bemusement and slight annoyance at the mishandling of established characters, previously unmentioned alliances, unsubstantiated additions that were only added to justify future works, and outright continuity errors. Frank Herbert wrote dryly but was terse enough to keep you enraptured; Brian Herbert writes like someone saying “Wouldn’t it be cool if…” It’s painful for a fan of the series to go though them, I don’t know how many times I stopped myself reading in the ‘House’ series and thought to myself “Wait! This was mentioned in Dune and this isn’t the way it happened according to ‘insert character.’” You think that they would have employed someone to go through their work whose job it is find continuity errors for them and send notes that they should be corrected. There is a person who holds that job title and that is the editor, who is also in charge of making sure that things of this poor quality do not reach the general public without extensive revision.

So what is an author to do when faced with a problem of this magnitude? Why go back so far into the past where continuity isn’t so much of a problem of course! The original Dune novel makes short references to an event called the Butlerian Jihad, described as the war against the thinking machines that had enslaved humanity and the basis for Dune’s status quo. It’s the reason that there are no computers in the Dune universe, the war was so devastating that they added a religious commandment to ensure that it did not happen again: Thou shall not make a machine in the likeness of a human mind.

This could have been fertile ground for a great series of books. The elements are there: a war for the survival of humanity, a fight for freedom from tyranny, the restructuring of society to ensure it never happens again, et cetera, et cetera. This was a war based one mother’s grief, Jehanne Butler (or Serena Butler, I’m going with the Dune Encyclopedia on this one) whose child was murdered by the thinking machines. How did they mess it up? Oh I have the answer, and it’s not pretty.

After the Butlerian Jihad trilogy was finished, Brian Herbert and Kevin J Anderson tackled the fabled Dune 7. You see, Frank Herbert died after Chapterhouse: Dune was published and it ended on a cliffhanger. Word around the campfire eventually got around about ten years ago that the Herbert estate had found some previously unknown files that had been a safety deposit box since the death of Frank Herbert and it was let slip that a nearly complete Dune 7 was among those effects. As I understood the rumors at the time all that need to be done was for some minor editing, almost to the point that only they needed to dot the is and cross the ts.

This was not so, when the book came it wasn’t one book, it was two now. That’s when Lucy and Ethel came out and did some explaining to Ricky. “Oh and we didn’t have a nearly full text, just some discarded ideas that we used” Even without this explanation, you realize that what they were doing in the previous six books was setting up for the last two books of the series. Hunter of Dune and Sandworms of Dune are the result of that and let me tell you, this is Dune as envisioned by a Dragonball Z fan on cocaine. There are events in this book that have no basis in a sane mind, let alone a Dune novel. Dune has gone from being a cerebral rumination on humanity, its path through time, science of addiction and any number of other themes to extended dance remix of Return of the Jedi.

It only gets worse. There were certain things that never happened in the original Dune novels that needed to happen for Brian and Kevin’s Sandworms and Hunters to make sense. Thus they have brought us Paul of Dune, the first in a series of new Dune novels which take place in between Dune and Dune Messiah. These retcon books are out there, I’m sure they suck, but I’m not going to read them but I will let you go with Shakespeare’s personal description of Brian and Kevin’s Dune novels.

“It is a tale, told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.”

[tags]literature,movies and tv[/tags]

Feb 192009
 

From the author of How to Survive a Horror Movie and the Big Book of Porn comes Pride and Prejudice and Zombies: The Classic Regency Romance – Now with Ultraviolent Zombie Mayhem! I for one am certainly looking forward to this reworked version of a ‘classic american novel’.  Pfah.  Now perhaps we’ll have a way to entice bored, violence saturated high school Juniors to read a stilted piece of literature that was in vogue over 200 years ago.

Seth Grahame-Smith has retained all of Jane Austen’s original text and increased the word count by 15% but done so in a bone-splinteringly awesome way.  He’s gone and added zombies.  It’s an idea that’s so simple it’s amazing no one has thought of it before.  A peanut butter and chocolate situation that’s found its way at the forefront of the media.

Seth Grahame-Smith, I would like to personally thank you!  It’s about time undead literature finds its place in the spotlight.  That reworking a so called classic piece of literature (read: boring, stuffy and as out of date as the bible) with ripping flesh and undead hordes has reached the spotlight simply shows that the American public (and America’s hat, Canada) are ready.

Since Romero shined a spotlight on the undead in ’68 – and by extension on our society, zombies in film and literature have become an accepted method of extemporizing on modern societal ills.  From the centralization of wealth in the few, political farce right through to woes of poverty and injustice for the poor.  In other words, Zombies are our problems and a select few ass kicking, head shot making, screw-driver-in-the-ear mofos are here to take care them!  Plain Jane can only benefit from zombie goodness in this author’s humble opinion.

[tags]zombies, literature[/tags]

Feb 192009
 

So you’ve probably heard about the upcoming book, Pride and Prejudice and Zombies: The Classic Regency Romance – Now with Ultraviolent Zombie Mayhem!, and its half sister Pride and Predator that Elton John is producing as a film. The blogosphere has been absolutely buzzing about it in the previous weeks. It’s strange that something like this is getting this much attention. Works like this have never been published before in traditional media, and when they have, they’ve been the butt of a joke, because they are just that: a joke. I’m not entirely certain if I find it very funny. Why? ‘Pride and Prejudice and Zombies’ is a garden variety, run of the mill fan fiction premise.

I haven’t read the book, I will admit that, it’s not even out yet so I can’t comment on the extra inserted material; it may well be very good, but the hype that is coming off this makes you think that this just might be the greatest thing to happen to classic fiction since chocolate met peanut butter. It’s been done before if you know where to look, and that place is the internet. The internet has a long tradition of letting crackpots get things off their chest, (like this editorial) and fan fiction is a huge part of that.

Are we as a society so culturally bankrupt that we have to cannibalize ideas and blend them together into a stew that’s so foul and disgusting that we can somehow find it refreshing? Probably, and I don’t like it. Besides, a better crossover would have been Jane Eyre meets Herbert West: Reanimator.

[tags]zombies, literature[/tags]

Feb 182009
 

Reviewer’s note: Final Crisis is DC Comic’s latest attempt at narrating a universe shaking, Ragnarok style, End of Days superhero tale, which is supposed to have major repercussions throughout its titles and universe. For those of you unfamiliar with DC, I have prepared a short, history of the DC Crises which have brought us to this point. This concise primer is to help give context to those who may be interested in the event, but are not familiar with the DCU’s history as a whole.

In 1985, the 60th anniversary of DC Comics, the company did something that was unprecedented and brand new at the time: as a company, it wiped the slate clean and started over with the Maxi-Series Crisis on Infinite Earths. This move wiped away over half a century of continuity, and simplified the cosmology of the universe from a multiverse of infinite possibilities and worlds, (one of which was supposedly our own) to one single universe. This opportunity was also used to bring many of its most powerful characters, most notoriously Superman, down to a more relatively realistic level.

Nine years later, in 1994, DC Published the now rarely mentioned Zero Hour: A Crisis in Time in response to continuity errors on part of the writers and editors errors since the previous event. This event was aimed mainly at fixing the timeline and the previously mentioned problems. The result was a sliding scale timeline for the appearance of the heroes so that it can always be noted that Superman, for example, first appeared in public ten years before hand and so on.
The third entry into the series is Infinite Crisis, published in 2005-2006, was an attempt by DC editorial to undo some of the limitations that had been placed on it and its writers by the first crisis. The net effect of this series was a return of the multiverse, albeit a decidedly abbreviated version limited to just 52 worlds, all with an Earth as the unifying factor.

Which brings us to Final Crisis, the latest chapter in the Crisis saga; it was advertised as ‘The Day Evil Won’ and alternately as “Heroes Die. Legends Live Forever.” This coming off the buzz of the phenomenal success of the year long weekly series Infinite Crisis spin-off 52 got fans buzzing. Lead writer of the series, Grant Morrison promised that his upcoming series would be a Lord of the Rings for the DCU; a statement that seemed to carry much hyperbole at the time as DC was back in its stride post-Infinite Crisis, DC with Morrison seemingly at the multiverses’ helm was in good hands, and his next entry in the Crisis series seemed to be the lighthouse after the long voyage on rough seas.

Final Crisis finally came. Its contents delivered gorgeous art, but very little in the way of story. This should have been a portent of things to come for this series, or the more truthful description of it: a series of series. Morrison has done this type of storytelling before, in his Seven Soldiers metaseries, this time he had help and it shows in a very unfortunate way.

To get the whole story of Final Crisis you cannot just read the main book proper, you have to read several other miniseries and one shots which are tied to the book. Almost all carry the Final Crisis branding on their covers, although there are two issues of Batman that tie in which do not. There is no official read order that I could find, but there are various clues strung throughout the main title that let the reader know where certain events take place and should be read. The titles branded as Final Crisis are listed below, and in no particular order:

• Final Crisis 1-7
• Final Crisis: Revelations 1-5
• Final Crisis: Requiem
• Final Crisis: Submit
• Final Crisis: Rage of the Red Lanterns
• Final Crisis: Resist
• Final Crisis: Rouges’ Revenge 1-3
• Final Crisis: Superman Beyond 3-D 1-2
• Final Crisis: Legion of Three Worlds 1-5 (unfinished at the time of this review)
• Final Crisis: Secret Files

For those keeping score, that’s 27 issues of comic books to keep up with to have the entire story and some of these only have a tenuous connection to the main story at best or not even acknowledged by it at all! But wait! There’s more! There are two issues of Batman that happen in between issues of the main title that don’t carry Final Crisis branding. Confused yet? We haven’t even gotten to the storytelling yet.

Confusion abounds when you try to read all these series as a whole. The one thing that does seem to tie the majority of these series together is the villain Libra who is building an army of supervillians to spread the gospel of evil as he describes it. It’s Libra who’s the MacGuffin of all these separate series, small appearances just to let you know that, yes, this is a Final Crisis series. Therein lies the problem, at least half of these series have no business being part of Final Crisis; they’re tying up loose ends from other series and the addition Libra to these stories is transparent. I still can’t figure out where exactly Final Crisis: Revelations fits in, but I’m told that it’s really, really important despite that there is no evidence for this claim in the main title. The absolute worst of this is Rage of the Red Lanterns which justifies its branding by a ‘wink and a quick kiss’ blurb on the first page of it’s place in the continuity.

As a critic, I realize that there is a fine line between editorializing and reviewing, but it seems that Grant Morrison and the DC editorial staff are intentionally trying to make this tough to review as a whole series. They want we, the readers, to view this as a large story, a tapestry that we have to stand far back from to get the bigger picture, but they forget that the modern reader believes that the devil is in the details, which brings me to the flagship title of the series.
Final Crisis starts out as a coherent straight out superhero story: the investigation of a god’s death. From there it begins to devolve into something that is less than the sum of its parts. It is self referential, but it gives little or no context for those references. Readers from month to month have deal with characters dropping in and out of the series with little coherence. Even when a character does come back from a previous issues appearance, there is no traditional editor’s note to reference this. Readers also have to deal with the daunting task of trying to keep track of the events of the story, as they are not told in a linear fashion. The linear storyline has a 5000 year tradition, reading comics should be a joy, building a puzzle should be a joy; Morrison took those two ideas, melded them together and then burned a quarter of the puzzle pieces, asking the reader to put it all together. I have learned to hate Morrison in seven moths or less.

The unifying theme of all of DC Comic’s Crises is that of change. The first crisis changed everything that we had known for sixty years, Zero Hour altered and organized our perception of time in the DCU, Identity Crisis (which is part of the Crisis family in name only) changed the lives of the DC heroes, and Infinite Crisis brought back a version of the multiverse. A crisis in the DC universe means change. It’s been nearly a month since the final issue (Legion of Three Worlds is still behind with two issues left at the time of this writing) and nothing has changed in the DCU. The calamity that was shown and described in its pages mean so little to its heroes that they don’t even bother to mention it in their main titles, so little that it could have been any given Tuesday to them. This is THE major problem of the series.

Here is the second major problem, but it may be its saving grace: Morrison is quoted as saying that this was going to be his Lord of the Rings before this was even published. I would put an even loftier label it on with stronger literary credit to it and I will do it reluctantly: this is Morrison’s Ulysses. Just like James Joyce, this work is almost impenetrable to anyone other than Morrison himself. It’s hard to read, it’s even harder to comprehend. I hate it and I have to admit that it may be a masterpiece of the medium. Art is measured by the emotional response that the viewer gives to it; it disgusted me in it’s storytelling, it made me hate the fact that some of the references go back to the early days of his run on JLA nearly ten years ago, it disgusted me that it spit in the face of over one hundred years of sequential art storytelling, it made me feel like a latecomer for dropping comics in the early 90s and coming back in time for Infinite Crisis. It made me hate it in a special way that most comic book readers never experience. I felt like the guy moving into a clean apartment with a new roommate, who experienced him slip slowly from a good friend into incoherent substance abuse and eventually had to intervene, kicking him out. The point is, it made me feel, and there aren’t many superhero comics out there that do that anymore, and that is its saving grace.

Recommended.

[tags]comic books, literature, review[/tags]